so, um...

I'm pregnant.

I had originally planned to test early on Wednesday, and if I got a negative, again today. But after the nausea train hit me on Tuesday, I figured it would be reasonable to test that night.

I read and re-read the instructions on my cheap-o BJ's brand pregnancy test (as I didn't want to waste my good Clear Blue Easy test on a possibly-too-soon testing round). It said that I'd have better results if I tested first thing in the morning, but could test any time. So I compromised and held my bladder for a couple of hours.

And then I tested. The test instructions said to expect a result in three minutes. Not 30 seconds after peeing on the stick, however, the positive sign in the test window started to form. I gave it another few seconds so it really looked like a "+" and then flew out of the bathroom to Pat, who was picking up a cell phone call from work. He got off the phone and I asked if the test results looked like I thought they looked to him. They did.

After shaking off the complete shock, I ran around the house saying, "holy crap, holy crap, holy crap."

I got online and tried to figure out a due date, based on when I ovulated. It's looking like the third week of October. Of course this will all have to be confirmed with the doctor.

The next morning, I tested again. Still pregnant. Called the doctor's office -- they don't want to see me until I'm eight weeks (they count from the date of your last period), so I've got an appointment for March 2nd.

Fought off a few waves of nausea, but nothing as significant as Tuesday. And I called my parents Wednesday night to tell them they were going to be grandparents.

We called Pat's parents last night, and I'm going to try to call my brother today, but we're not telling people for a little longer. We'd like to keep it under wraps at least until we check in with the doctor and make sure all is well so far. We probably won't go entirely public until I'm through my first trimester. However, at the rate I'm going, I'll be huge by then.

I can't stop eating. Not only am I snacking like crazy throughout the day (to help stave off the nausea), I'm eating at least 50-75% more than I normally do at meals. When I've got a plate of food in front of me, I just start shoveling it in; I don't even stop to look at Pat or have a conversation. I have tunnel vision for food. I must eat. I'm fully aware that I'm doing this, and I'm aware that I look like Jordan McDeer on Studio 60 when I'm doing it, but I can't stop. This must be what compulsive eaters feel like.

I'm also extremely susceptible to food advertising. There was a commercial on the other night for Dunkin Donuts' Maple Cheddar Breakfast Sandwich. Normally, this would have grossed me out. I hate breakfast sandwiches. But I found myself strangely attracted to it.

So far, I have a small pot-belly -- it looks like I just finished Thanksgiving dinner. Fortunately, it's not anything that's visible when I'm dressed. It just makes my pants tight. I'm living in my 5% spandex low-rise pants right now. Let's hear it for the fat-ification of America -- it will make my weight gain that much easier to clothe and cover up.

My boobs are bigger than they've ever been, which is to say that they're actually giving my bras something to hold up. This is a welcome side effect.

Other symptoms/side effects to date: extreme thirst (I drink water before bed and 5 minutes later, I've got a swollen tongue); bad gas (of the "what died in here" persuasion) and heartburn at night; feeling "full" (beyond the stomach type of full); a smattering of pimples (hey, welcome back, puberty); headaches (at work); fatigue (nothing too extreme, it's just getting difficult to fight inertia).

So that's the news. I feel good. We're super excited. And I'm totally hungry again.